Just a short note

     Just a short post.  I guess the appt. with Dr. S went well, yesterday.  He said my brain looked healthy, so that was great news.  I was kinda worried, there.  He also said my breathing and talking sounded better, even though I am still so raspy.  It's hard to talk, so I am sorry if I don't answer all phone calls.  Just know that I love you and thank you all for your thoughts and prayers.  Hopefully one of these heart meds. will help out a bit more.  I feel stronger by taking small walks, and it's not as much of an effort to breathe.
     I had my second treatment of Abraxane yesterday, and it knocked my down for the day.  It makes you sort of feel like you are full of lead.  Really heavy and hard to move.  I feel better today, and walked around the mall with my Mother in Law and shopped for Sarah.  She is growing so fast.  So tall and thin!
     Rick shaved my head last night, it was really looking horrible.  It feels good to have that mess off of my head and I imagine myself in battle mode now.  Ive got lots of battle scars.  The boys had this X-Wing star fighter toy from StarWars when they were little, and I remember saying"What the heck are all these marks all over the toy?", and they told me "it's battle damage, it makes it cool".  Sometimes I can feel a bit of self pity about all of my scars, I've got quite a few, but I guess it just means I'm cool. (I wish my boys thought that, though)
     I miss my hair, it was looking pretty and my bangs were just starting to grow out, but on the positive side, I do not have to shave my legs, pluck eyebrows, nose hairs, or wax my mustache.  There's a silver lining to every cloud.
     My big brother, Jimmy , is coming down this week, and my Mother and I are so excited.  I can't wait to see him.  I might even ask him to drive me to my wig appt. on Monday.  I'm sure he will be thrilled. ; /
     Well, still achy and but doing okay.  Happy my brain appears clean and Dr. said breathing sounded better, so hopefully that is a sign that the tumors are shrinking.  That's my prayer.  When I get myself a bit more gussied up I will post a picture of my bald head, just for thrills.
     Just to let you know, I am working to keep myself focused on my blessings, and my Heavenly Father. I know He is with me, and has set a race before me, my own personal race track, and my desire is to run it  with all the strength and endurance He gives me. My race track is different than yours or others.  Mine seems to go up hills and around corners and over hurdles, and veer off into the woods.  Somebody else's race track may be a nice loop with some bumps, or other obstacles, but they are all seen by the Lord, and those hurdles and bumps were put there with the OK from The Father, and that is comforting. Many, many other people have a much more difficult track set out before them, than mine, that's for sure.  Nothing enters our live that has not gone through his hands. The good news is, is that we only have to do it a day at a time, and He is with us every step of the way. If you think I am strong, or if there is anything admirable you see in me, there is not.  I am scared, but my Savior gives me the strength and the endurance and the hope to keep on going, truly, He does.  I am leaning on Him very heavily, and He is sustaining me and my family.  Not to be too dour, everyone here is handling things well(except for me, sometimes), but it is our faith in God and His promises, and the salvation He offered us, that gets us through.
     Well, this was not such a short post, but I am done now.  I love all you guys, and thank you for posting responses to my posts.  I love to see what you guys say.  It's weird talking about myself.  Got any ideas I can write about?  Nothing political because I am at a loss on that front.  Anyhoo, going to have some tea, and settle in for the night.

Like I said, Love Ya,
Joann